It was only last week when I sat at my desk and cried. My heart hurt...and there was no reason for it. I had one son who simply said, "I can't wait for next school year," only 4 weeks into this one. Sigh... I had 2 boys get cut from hockey travel team try outs...again. Their spirits were high, but mine were crushed. I have one son looking forward to driving in a few weeks, but until then I'm at his beckon call to get him where he needs to be. And finally, my eldest is trying to put all the pieces together for his senior year...which means adulthood looms in the future for both of us.
As a parent, there are just some days you can't handle everything that is coming your way. So yes, you sit and cry and get it out of your system. And somedays you have to remember why you did this in the first place.
Watching your kids grow, fail, enjoy, despise, it's hard on everyone involved. I chose to sit and write a letter to each of my children, and my husband, and praise what they bring to me each and everyday. It's so easy to dwell on negative. (I don't know why, but it is.) I let them know how proud I was of them and how much they mean to me. I needed them to know what was in my heart, because so often it's what's on our mind that comes out and not what's in our heart when we speak.
I left these letters on each person's pillows. I had one son thank me for the letter, and my husband did as well. But it was when I saw them hanging on their walls that I realized that my words meant something to them too. They left their letters where they would see them everyday. Sharing my love with all of them brightened my day...and I guess maybe it brightened theirs too.