Two more days.

Two more days until my eldest becomes a Senior in high school. My next will be a Sophomore who will have a driver's license. My twins are heading into 7th grade and a new school. And now my baby inches into his last 2 years of elementary school. 

The emotions are all over the place this week. I cry at the drop of a hat. (Tomorrow is continuation...Just know I'll be a wreck!) 

Today, however, is silent. It's my last workday without kids until August (I have the blessing of working from home.) From now one it'll take all my discipline to work around them. Luckily, I love my job, so it doesn't really seem like work--but it is and it's going to have to get done. 

I keep telling myself, in the silence of my house, get your To Do list caught up. Finish your emails. Get a huge jump on your next manuscript. You're not going to have time like this after the next two days. In two more days you're going to have to schedule in your work, you're going to have to be even more focused with all these distractions around you. You need to get busy.

Today it's just not happening. I'm soaking in the fact that my house is in order. The laundry will be done--it has to get there. The window is open and there is no rain. A friend came over this morning and I love to chat with her. I often work from my treadmill or at 4am. Why should it be different just because the kids are home? I'm guessing I'll be more productive during those hours--I know I will be.

Two more days, I promise myself, I won't let the papers on my desk dictate the time I have to spend with these kiddos. I promise to let them have some freedom this summer and to try new things. I promise to not care if the house is in order so much.  I promise to build a million memories. 

Two more days and the house will be noisy for the next two and a half months. 

Two more days and I'll really appreciate this silence I'm working in. (Or avoiding working in.)

I promise to embrace these next two days and all the days that come after. Because in a few years all I'll have left are the silent days in which to get my work done. The boys will be gone trying to wrap their heads around working and children, but they'll have lots and lots of memories to go on with because I promised to make the most of their summers...even while I worked from home.

Admittedly green smoothies are one of the ugliest concoctions out there, but done just right they can be mmm-mmm yummy.

Today's smoothie is spinach, carrots, celery, and strawberries. Very simple. I add plenty of water to make it smooth. (Chunky smoothies and pulpy smoothies take some getting used to. More water will help.) I also add some "secret" ingredients. Another one of my favorite things (which I will cover in another post on another Friday) is Advocare's Spark and Replenish. Specifically to this smoothie I added a scoop of Mandarin Orange Spark and a scoop of Mango Pineapple Replenish. Talk about YUMMY!!!

Other things I like to add to my smoothies are kale (my fave), parsley, green apples, bananas, pineapple, and peaches. Often the smoothie gets made by what I have in the fridge.

If you're like me, getting in your two servings of fruit or four servings of veggies isn't always easy. I find that by drinking this in the morning I'm not only satisfied, but I also don't have the cravings for something sweet (which I usually do even in the morning.)

During the summer I'll grow my own kale and strawberries. When my harvest is big enough, or my produce is more plentiful than my green smoothie consumption, I will blend up my ingredients individually and freeze them in an ice cube tray. This will keep them for another time.

Are you a green smoothie maker? What do you put in your smoothies?

Have a great GREEN Friday!
Bernadette Marie


If you're interested in learning more about the Advocare products I add to my smoothies you can check out my site. (I don't mention the products to sell them. I mention them because I love them and have enjoyed them since 2004. But I'm happy to also answer any questions you might have.) https://www.advocare.com/130113297

April and May, those are two words that scare any parent with school aged kids. (Kudos to the teachers, ESPECIALLY if they too are parents. How do they manage?)

Our clan boasted (during April and May) 3 hockey teams, 4 choirs, 2 orchestras, 1 band, 1 trip to D.C., 1 field day (all 5 boys went! woot!), 3 dates of musical, weeks of practice, 1 act plays, a funeral, rehearsal for graduation (music not the graduate...yet), conferences, parties, tests, tests, and did I mention tests? 

I sometimes wonder if these months are set up that way so that we are very ready for summer!

But as the end of the school year approaches and the promise of fun and relaxation starts, there is a whole new set of things that come along. There are camps to attend, lunches to think about, deciding on whether they can stay up later and making sure I don't let them sleep in too long. The big boys have summer jobs (which will start at 4am and get them up and moving! yeah!) After a few weeks the heat and the boredom set in. The need for that schedule comes along. Suddenly you're missing the antics of April and May and wishing you had something to do, such as rehearse or watch a concert. Or that's what we tell ourselves.

This end of school year stuff seems to have been very emotional for me this year. I have driven away from the elementary school crying more times than I can remember. April and May bring the reality that our kids are growing up and too fast I might add. When we started elementary school in 2003 my twins were 5 weeks old. Now my baby will be going into 5th grade, those twins moving schools and going into 7th. The oldest will be a senior and the 15 year old will be a driving sophomore next year. It's fleeting and April and May seem to be the constant reminders that your kids are moving on to the next adventure in their lives. Sure they may be busy, but they are busy with growth.

Moms and dads cry when the kids sing in their concerts, because some of them are the last ones. We hold our hands on our chests to keep our rapidly beating hearts inside as we listen to our kiddos play songs on instruments that just a few years ago squeaked. We take a zillion pictures of them playing some silly game at field day because they will never do it again. This is April and May.

So we blame the crazy on the schedule. We cry because we're overwhelmed. But lets be honest,  that's just a cover up. We are mushy, sappy people who don't want it to end so fast. 

My very favorite grandmother passed away on April 28th. This will be my first mother's day without her. When she was in hospice, a social worker asked my mother what four words would describe her mother? It's quite hard when you're put on the spot to come up with four that would pinpoint them. However, it got me thinking. For Mother's Day I was going to give my mother 4 words.

My mother is PATIENT.
She was that mom who would wait for you in a parking lot to come out of school while you goofed around. She was the one who would tolerate your friends even if she didn't like them. She would sit for hours while my sister and I splashed in our pool and I'm sure she had lots of other things to do. Some nights went into early morning when she'd sit at the table while I cried about being a thirteen year old girl. Though she was probably angry often, she was patient on letting go of those feelings. And even now, she's patient with me when she needs me and I'm busy.

My mother is INDEPENDENT.
Though she will ask for help when she needs it, she does almost anything she wants on her own. My father did, and still does, work crazy hours. There was no counting on him to help with my sister and I. We were a trio that did everything. She took us anywhere. Now that we're not at home, she's been able to go to classes and learn new things, travel on her own, and meet new people. I find this skill to be very intimidating and it took me nearly thirty-three years to grasp even the littlest bit of it.

My mother is CREATIVE.
Gosh she can create some of the most awesome things. I'd say she was a Pinterest mom before it was a thing. Over the years her creativeness has gone from knitted clothes, to Tri-Chem art, to ceramics, to ornament creations. She's a calligraphy artist, an ornament maker, and a sewing expert. In the past twenty years she found her passion is in quilting. Now she's a fabric artist that teaches classes and makes some of the most amazing quilts you've ever seen. 

My mother is LOVE.
Though there have been times I suppose my mother and I didn't see eye to eye there simply isn't a time when I could say I didn't feel loved. If anything, I think my sister and I knew that she loved us more than she loved anyone or anything in the world. I have five sons that love their grandmother so much and it's not just because they call her Grandma. It's because they know they are loved by her and in turn love her to pieces. 

I'm very blessed that I hear, "You're a great mom," a lot. I think I was able to take all of the good things from my mother and roll them into my parenting. I was very lucky to have the mother I had growing up.  She taught me how to be patient, independent, creative, and to love my children with all my heart and unconditionally. Hopefully those are things I too will pass on to my children for when they become fathers.

I love you, Mom. Happy Mother's Day!

I'm learning to embrace YouTube thanks to my kids. They are usually entranced with it (which makes me wonder why I pay for TV programming.) However, one day in a plea to find some yoga instruction, at five o'clock in the morning, I happened across a YouTube channel called Yoga with Adriene.

Part of a successful yoga practice is enjoying the teacher. Adriene seems to have just enough of a silly side you'd want to be her friend and a soothing manner that you don't realize time slipping away while you follow her into a calm wonderland. I'm currently working my way through the 30 days of yoga that she has up on YouTube (and oh boy she has a whole lot more too.)

So this is one of my favorite things. Yoga with Adriene. Check it out and see if she moves you too.

You can find her on YouTube and Facebook.
Yoga with Adriene

The strangest things happen in this house. If you put something away (where it belongs) it suddenly disappears. It's the craziest phenomenon. 

Seriously, when you look into the eyes of my sons and they tell you it was right there, they absolutely believe that to be true. They don't remember simply discarding it on the table, the floor, or leaving it in the car. That wasn't them. It was that mischievous monster.

Of course, the interesting part about this monster, is the fact he tells me where he puts everything. This would be according the the reactions of my children. Why else would I hear the question, "Where is my (insert anything here)?"

I'm not sure who to hire to exterminate this monster. Life would certainly be a lot easier if he found a different home. Although, I think there must be an overpopulation of mischievous monsters, because all mothers I talk to say they have one too.

It's an epidemic I say. 

As a mother I hope to someday tame him. Yes, that's what I will set out to do, tame the mischievous monster. Then all the lost things will always be found. It's okay that they won't look to me for locations of missing items. I'll bet the tamed mischievous monster and I could find a new hobby.

It was 1989 and I turned 17. Wow! I was going into my senior year in high school. I had already been accepted into the University of Northern Colorado and I had been driving for a year. My summer had been spent working over 40 hours a week for my dad. (I was a very captive audience then and no bills.) Life was good! But it had taken its time getting there...that 17th year!

We've all heard our mother's say the words, "It goes much faster when you're older." But at 17 time just drags along. Here you go mom, in front of everyone reading...YOU WERE RIGHT!!!!

It was a Sunday morning, when after years and years of fertility procedure failures, we found out we were FINALLY having a baby. The woman who did the ultrasound said, "You're having a girl!" Thank goodness, because I'm kinda of a princess. What in the world would I ever have done with a boy?

Nine months later it was a Wednesday, tax day, when we went to the hospital. And at 11:56 pm they hand me this bundle and say, "Wow, he's a big boy!"

You have to be kidding me.

Despite that initial shock, I fell in love harder than I ever thought possible. Off we went on our adventure as mother and son. Add a few more brothers and a new house, time zipped along. One night I fell asleep and woke up to a kid who out weighed me and towered over me at nearly 6'3". He took the keys to the car and drove away to high school. Seriously, I was just in high school. It took me seventeen long years to get to where he is...and he did that in a blink of an eye. 

I never was one to believe in time travel, but I'm beginning to think that somewhere I jumped into a Delorian and zipped into the future. I'm holding on to every single second of it and thinking that in a mere few years he'll be writing some blog talking about his seventeen year old. Perhaps that's why God gave me 5 sons, so I could live this devastation four more times. Or perhaps it's because I haven't said the phrase, "I was seventeen once. I know what you're thinking," enough times yet. 

Regardless of how it happened, it has made me realize a lot of things. You have to hold on to every single moment because they are flashing before your eyes. Cherish every step and every year. I'm lucky and I know it. That kid that towers over me still hugs me all the time. He still asks permission to do things and he still says he loves me and he respects me. I'm pretty proud of that stranger that took over my little boy's body. I guess it's been a good seventeen years. 

A house of boys...not just 1 or 2. Not just 3 or 4. When you count all the boys in this house there are 6. (Yes, that includes Dad, but the boys always include him when asked...so I thought I would too.)

Usually the first thing you will hear when you walk into my house is, "Please excuse our mess," as I bend over to pick up a random article that is in the path of my guest walking into my house. But over the past seventeen years of being a mother I've learned, this is what home is all about. 

I have classifications for all my boys, according to their method of cleaning/or not. They certainly go through phases and they move in and out of them. 

There is the Couch Clutterer:
This title has moved from one to another over the years. It used to be called the "Locker" for my second oldest son, since that's where we'd find his things. It is now called the "Dresser" for my youngest, as this is where I can find an entire week's worth of discarded clothing.

There is the Collector: 
Currently this title goes to the 4th born. He is into Rubik's cubes and they are everywhere! This is not to rival the massive collection of duct tape in all colors and prints. When he dives into an obsession he does it with all his heart.

There is the Everywhere kid:
This title goes to the "middle" son. A little of him is scattered all through the entire house (inside and out and in the car too.)

The Relocater:
This goes back to the second born. Though his belongings aren't usually scattered around, there is usually one pile that moves each time I ask for him to pick it up. It just changes location.

Then lastly The Room Dumpers:
This title goes to my bookend kiddos. The eldest and the youngest. They don't have things all over the house. (minus the youngest's clothes) All belongings are in their bedrooms. And sometimes you can see a small piece of carpet in their rooms.

Now, I get all upset over this. It's true. I throw more Mommy Meltdowns over the tidiness of my house more than I do any other thing. But then I'm reminded of my mother's saying when I was growing up, "We live in our house." It's so true!!! We don't show off our home. We don't entertain everyday. We sleep here. We eat here. We laugh here. We love here. We are family here. Everyone's items mixing with everyone else's is what home is. A bringing together of all things that are important to each other. I'll miss when there are no Lego pieces underfoot and old homework assignments stacked on a table. I'll miss hockey pucks in my yard and smelly sports equipment in my garage.

So, yes. I'm going to say, "Pardon the mess," and invite you in. You're never really going to notice it are you? You're going to think how wonderfully full of love my house is. You'd be right and now you're in my home and you're part of our family. Welcome. 

~Bernadette~